• Business
    • Case Studies
    • Companies
    • Growth
    • Strategy
  • Functional
    • Finance
    • HR
    • Marketing
    • Science & Tech
  • Leadership
    • Be a Leader
    • Books
    • LDR Show
    • Leadership Nuggets
    • Movie Wisdom
    • Podcasts
    • Women & Leadership
  • Personal
    • Character
    • Values
    • Competence
  • Podcasts
  • Videos
  • E-Mag
  • Assessments
  • Subscribe
  • About Us
Leaderonomics.com
Leaderonomics.com
  • Business
    • Case Studies
      Crisis Communication: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

      Crisis Communication: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

      The 5 Step Plan to a Winning Social Media Presence

      The 5 Step Plan to a Winning Social Media Presence

      Embracing Digital To Power Growth

      Embracing Digital To Power Growth

      Malaysia: Celebrating A Nation's History

      Malaysia: Celebrating A Nation's History

    • Companies
      Intention Matters, But Unwritten Rules Actually Create Company Cultures

      Intention Matters, But Unwritten Rules Actually Create Company Cultures

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

      "As you keep developing your skills, you become like a fine wine", Says Nithin Kamath

      "As you keep developing your skills, you become like a fine wine", Says Nithin Kamath

    • Growth
      Don’t Underestimate the Impact of Disengaged Employees

      Don’t Underestimate the Impact of Disengaged Employees

      The Importance of Legacy in Leadership

      The Importance of Legacy in Leadership

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

    • Strategy
      Don’t Underestimate the Impact of Disengaged Employees

      Don’t Underestimate the Impact of Disengaged Employees

      Pssst! Are You Overworked?

      Pssst! Are You Overworked?

      "As you keep developing your skills, you become like a fine wine", Says Nithin Kamath

      "As you keep developing your skills, you become like a fine wine", Says Nithin Kamath

      What If You Ran Your Business Like an Over-Achieving Spanish Soccer Club?

      What If You Ran Your Business Like an Over-Achieving Spanish Soccer Club?

  • Functional
    • Finance
      How Your Personality with Money Can Influence Your Financial Decisions

      How Your Personality with Money Can Influence Your Financial Decisions

      Making It in Corporate Finance

      Making It in Corporate Finance

      The Disruption in Accounting and Finance

      The Disruption in Accounting and Finance

      An Income for Everyone

      An Income for Everyone

    • HR
      The Six Pillars of Vibrant Workplace Culture

      The Six Pillars of Vibrant Workplace Culture

      A Lesson in Leadership from the HR Perspective

      A Lesson in Leadership from the HR Perspective

      Understanding Performance Management Today

      Understanding Performance Management Today

      Change and Disruption: Fight It or Embrace It?

      Change and Disruption: Fight It or Embrace It?

    • Marketing
    • Science & Tech
      May the 4th Industrial Revolution Be with You: Part 1

      May the 4th Industrial Revolution Be with You: Part 1

      6 Key Digital Trends to Look Out for in 2020 and Beyond

      6 Key Digital Trends to Look Out for in 2020 and Beyond

      How Embodying Trust Builds Big Picture Leadership Capability

      How Embodying Trust Builds Big Picture Leadership Capability

      The Future of the Wood Manufacturing Industry in Malaysia

      The Future of the Wood Manufacturing Industry in Malaysia

  • Leadership
    • Be a Leader
      Caring in Leadership Isn't a Luxury - It Lies at the Heart of a Team's Success

      Caring in Leadership Isn't a Luxury - It Lies at the Heart of a Team's Success

      A Lesson in Leadership from the HR Perspective

      A Lesson in Leadership from the HR Perspective

      Fastest Woman on Earth Leaves Competition in the Dust

      Fastest Woman on Earth Leaves Competition in the Dust

      Should a 4-Day Workweek Be the New Norm?

      Should a 4-Day Workweek Be the New Norm?

    • Books
      Lessons from Tara Westover's Memoir, 'Educated'

      Lessons from Tara Westover's Memoir, 'Educated'

      Michelle Obama Says One Decision Separates People Who Achieve Success from The Rest

      Michelle Obama Says One Decision Separates People Who Achieve Success from The Rest

      Why You Should Assess A Leader’s Capacity For Critical Thinking And Judgment

      Why You Should Assess A Leader’s Capacity For Critical Thinking And Judgment

      5 Skills You Need To Be A Great CEO

      5 Skills You Need To Be A Great CEO

    • LDR Show
      It Started as a Fluke: Making It in the Hotel Business

      It Started as a Fluke: Making It in the Hotel Business

      Leaving a Mark That Goes Beyond Business

      Leaving a Mark That Goes Beyond Business

      Through the Ups and Downs of Business

      Through the Ups and Downs of Business

      Coding Made Easy with Low Code

      Coding Made Easy with Low Code

    • Leadership Nuggets
      Leadership in Four Dimensions: Jonas Prising on Human Resources, Malaysia and Leadership

      Leadership in Four Dimensions: Jonas Prising on Human Resources, Malaysia and Leadership

      "Have Intentionality In Your Daily Life", says Kim Underhill

      "Have Intentionality In Your Daily Life", says Kim Underhill

      "Explorers Are Map Makers", Says Jana Stanfield

      "Explorers Are Map Makers", Says Jana Stanfield

      Leadership Nuggets: Worry Not When We Fail

      Leadership Nuggets: Worry Not When We Fail

    • Movie Wisdom
      What I Learnt About Leadership from the Game of Thrones

      What I Learnt About Leadership from the Game of Thrones

      Lessons From Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson

      Lessons From Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson

      Leadership Lessons From Madam Secretary

      Leadership Lessons From Madam Secretary

      Lessons From A 68-Year-Old Classic That Changed The Face Of Visual Storytelling

      Lessons From A 68-Year-Old Classic That Changed The Face Of Visual Storytelling

    • Podcasts
      The Importance of Legacy in Leadership

      The Importance of Legacy in Leadership

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      The Secret Sauce Behind the Success of a Co-Working Space

      Understanding Performance Management Today

      Understanding Performance Management Today

      Personal Change Affecting  Your Career

      Personal Change Affecting Your Career

    • Women & Leadership
      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

      Women in Leadership: Opportunities, Balance, Challenges and Support

      3 Easy Ways Women Can Demonstrate Their Authority at Work

      3 Easy Ways Women Can Demonstrate Their Authority at Work

      Be A Leader With Queen Oprah

      Be A Leader With Queen Oprah

      5 Lessons from the Life of Chetna Sinha

      5 Lessons from the Life of Chetna Sinha

  • Personal
    • Character
      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      How to Overcome Overthinking and Get More Done

      How to Overcome Overthinking and Get More Done

      11 Things Organised and Productive People Do Every Day

      11 Things Organised and Productive People Do Every Day

      Hiking – Reflections That Will Take You to Greater Heights

      Hiking – Reflections That Will Take You to Greater Heights

    • Values
      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      Hiking – Reflections That Will Take You to Greater Heights

      Hiking – Reflections That Will Take You to Greater Heights

      The Power of Compassion in Leadership

      The Power of Compassion in Leadership

      Raise Your Game: Forming Your Identity

      Raise Your Game: Forming Your Identity

    • Competence
      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      J.K. Rowling Says Success Has Nothing to Do With 'Destiny'

      How to Overcome Overthinking and Get More Done

      How to Overcome Overthinking and Get More Done

      11 Things Organised and Productive People Do Every Day

      11 Things Organised and Productive People Do Every Day

      Infographic: How Good Are Your Problem Solving Skills?

      Infographic: How Good Are Your Problem Solving Skills?

  • Podcasts
  • Videos
  • E-Mag
  • Assessments
  • Subscribe
  • About Us
  • Follow
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Linkedin
    • Youtube
    • Instagram
Home
Personal

Was That A Blink Or A Wink?

July 26th, 2014 Personal

Share this article

Facebook Twitter Google+ LinkedIn Pinterest
Was That A Blink Or A Wink?Personal

Your body language speaks volumes about you! (Part I)

By WENDY LEE

Someone once asked me if I’ve ever been late for classes. Not unless my three alarm clocks die on me simultaneously. After a decade of conducting various training programmes, it would really only take me 10 minutes to get myself ready.

So, why am I always earlier than anyone else? Body language. When I’m early, it allows me to “read” my participants as they walk in.

From the moment the person greets me, whether it’s a soft “hello”, a loud “good morning” or a reluctant “hi”, it allows me to do a quick profiling of them.

When seated together, whether participants carry out small talks, or choose to have their noses buried in their smartphones, also give out signals on whether they signed up for training voluntarily or had their names hand-picked by management.

We step into unfamiliar ground when we attend public seminars or workshops. Most of the time, we won’t know who the speaker is or whom we will be seated with. All these uncertainties cause us to display real and involuntary movements which speak volumes about us.

Now, imagine if you have to attend or make a presentation in an important board meeting – the fear will be heightened 10-fold! If you make a conscious effort to be aware of every gesture you make, especially in times of stress, then you can control and make your body language work for you.

Below are real-life behavioural examples that I see in every class. Check if you are guilty of any.

1. Are you the one to greet first?

When a person walks in, I will usually pause a few seconds to see if he/she greets me first. A more confident person will usually take the initiative to announce his/her arrival; whereas a shy individual will usually smile or only reply after I initiate the first move.

Lesson: The one who greets first will always have the upper hand. It sends a signal that you are assured and confident.

The tone of your voice, volume pace and emotion also influence the messages you send. Increase your volume, but not your pitch. Higher volume projects higher authority. If your pitch goes up at the end of the sentence, it will sound as if you are seeking approval, making you seem less confident.

2. Do you stop to look or slouch to seek?

After signing in at the registration counter, two things happen.

A participant will either walk in with an upright posture, scan the room, and take his/her seat. Or, he/she will stoop a little, with the neck and head stretched forward slightly, as if seeking for a familiar face to sit with, before heading towards a seat (which is usually the furthest from the speaker).

Lesson: Your posture speaks a lot about you. Each part of your body works separately as well as together to send non-verbal cues.

In creating an executive presence, walk with an upright posture! Keep your chin parallel to the floor, your shoulders straight and take your time to pan across the room.

Keep your head straight and walk specifically towards your chosen seat. Don’t turn your head and avoid darting your eyes everywhere. Aim to maintain a calm and collected look.

3. Do you initiate a handshake?

As my participants enter the classroom, I will wait to see who extends a hand, or who will just greet me with a “hello”.

If nothing happens (exception for Muslim men to whom I will usually greet with a smile and nod), I will then move forward to shake their hands.

Apart from creating rapport, the first physical contact with a person by a handshake is a good indicator of your level of confidence.

Lesson: Cultural norm dictates that a person of a higher standing, in age or in rank, should initiate a handshake. If both are equal, the person who offers the handshake first will be perceived as one with more confidence.

So when someone extends his/her hand to you, reciprocate with a confident, web-to-web touching, full palm grip if you want to project an image of poise and professionalism.

Anything that is weak or soft indicates that you may be a timid person lacking self-esteem. Anything that is too strong may result in the other person resenting you for hurting their hand!

handshake

4. Front or back seat?

In any seminar or workshop, it is common to see people occupying the back seats first. One of the many reasons is to make a quick escape if the lecture is dull.

However, for those whose attendance is compulsory, the shy or reluctant individuals will usually take the back seat. The more outspoken or eager ones will head straight to the front.

Lesson: In the business world, we spend a great deal of time in various meetings. Where you sit, how you sit and whom you sit with play an integral role in how you are perceived by your fellow colleagues.

For example, a person seated at the head of the table is generally perceived as someone of a higher status.

However, if you want to be seen as influential, then make a conscious effort to sit next to a leader. If you constantly hide behind, you will gradually fade into the background.

5. Arms and legs folded or stretched out?

A common phenomenon observed at the start of every session is where people would either fold their arms or hide them under the table, lean towards the table or slump back with their legs crossed.

These are indicators of people who are defensive or resistant.

Even the way a person places his/her tent card – whether he/she keeps it close to her or pushes it farther away from the body – shows the level of openness.

Lesson: During meetings, have a relaxed posture. You don’t have to be so stiff that you look unnaturally attentive. Just sit on half your chair, lean forward slightly and place your arms on the table.

Keep your eyes on the speaker. Don’t flip through the papers and don’t doodle. Don’t scroll through your messages either. If you need to gesture with your hands, keep them controlled, and preferably no higher than your chin level.

If you come across similar negative gestures with people you are trying to connect with, then hand out your business cards or offer the person a cup of tea – anything as long as they uncross their arms and legs.

Body language is a very powerful tool for influencing others in many ways. So hone your skills in this area; be aware of all the silent signals you are sending. Learn also to decipher what other people are “saying” by reading gestures and expressions.

Wendy Lee is president of Mabic (Malaysian Association of Brand & Image Consultants) and a director of BII (Brand Image International Institute). She is a firm believer that with style… there must be substance! Send us your feedback at editor@leaderonomics.com . Click here for more articles. 

Share this :

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)
  • Tags
  • Body Language
  • Confidence
  • Handshake
  • Image Matters
  • Posture
  • Silent Signals
  • Wendy Lee
Next article Starting Them Young
Previous article Mind Your Language(s)

Related Posts

How To Put Your Best Self Forward Character

How To Put Your Best Self Forward

Are You Sabotaging Yourself? Personal

Are You Sabotaging Yourself?

Your First Business Card: Good Manners and Etiquette Character

Your First Business Card: Good Manners and Etiquette

Mind Your Body Language: 9 Tips For The Workplace Personal

Mind Your Body Language: 9 Tips For The Workplace

Power Up With Your Garb! Personal

Power Up With Your Garb!

Learn From: The First Step To Becoming A Fantastic Spokesperson Business

Learn From: The First Step To Becoming A Fantastic Spokesperson

1 Comment

  1. Was That A Blink Or A Wink? | Leaderonomics.com
    September 13, 2014 at 1:06 am Reply ↓

    […] In July, I posed five points on some of the lessons learnt from the body language of our workshop participants who attend corporate trainings. If you missed it, do access it here. […]

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Bahasa Malaysia | English

Pick of The Week

Dec 7th 6:47 AM
Functional

The Six Pillars of Vibrant Workplace Culture

Dec 6th 9:08 AM
Leadership

A Lesson in Leadership from the HR Perspective

Dec 5th 9:00 AM
Business

Don’t Underestimate the Impact of Disengaged Employees

NEW – The Leaderonomics Show

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ft7JHfu_PL4

Leaderonomics FM – Now on Spotify/iTunes!

https://leaderonomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/07/Leaderonomics-FM.wav
  • Business
  • Functional
  • Leadership
  • Personal
  • Podcasts
  • Videos
  • E-Mag
  • Assessments
  • Subscribe
  • About Us
  • Back to top

About Leaderonomics.com

Leaderonomics.com is a leadership portal owned by Leaderonomics, a social enterprise passionate about transforming nations through leadership development. Leaderonomics.com features leadership insights, trends, CEOs, thought leaders, HR leaders and inspiring real-life stories for your personal and professional development.

Contact Us | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy      
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed on this website are those of the writers or the people they quoted and not necessarily those of Leaderonomics.
[Sitemap | RSS]
Copyright © 2010-2019 Leaderonomics Media Sdn Bhd. All rights reserved