Who Cheers For You?

By DAN ROCKWELL

You cheer for others. But who cheers for you? Some can’t stand it if you’re “too” happy.

Most are okay if you’re a little bit happy or a little bit successful… if you’re average.

It’s okay to long for more but whatever you do, don’t actually reach for it. And heaven forbid if it happens.

Too happy 

If you’re too happy, kill-joys give you a good dose of “reality”. Too much success and they’ll warn, “Watch out for arrogance”.

Maybe it’s a parent, spouse, boss, or colleague. You find yourself holding back your enthusiasm around them because you know they can’t stand it.

Vulnerable

I’m never more vulnerable than when I’m celebrating. Someone comes along and lets me know that I’m not quite there, yet. Ouch!

Have you ever shared your excitement and have someone remain detached?

Thanks a million! You learn to keep celebrations to yourself.

Creating cheerleaders 

Take a vacation from critiques, tweaks, and improvements.

Establish no-negativity time. Saturday morning is positive-time, for example.

No improvements. No tweaks.

Just positive speech or silence. Make it fun.

Establish a fine for violations and put the money in the pizza fund.

Receive praise with gratitude.

The problem may be you. The less comfortable you are at receiving praise, the less frequently it occurs.

Establish the 3-to-1 rule.

Call for everyone to make three positive statements for every negative. Positive speech builds positive environments. Words are rudders.

Celebrate small.

Stop waiting for the big stuff.

Find a brag buddy.

Stop people before they add the negative to a positive.

Bonus: Invite whiners, kill-joys, and complainers to make three positive statements. Say, “I’ll wait.”

How can you build a positive vibe around your life and leadership?

Dan Rockwell is a coach and speaker and is freakishly interested in leadership. He is an author of a world-renowned leadership blog, Leadership Freak. To get in touch with Dan, write to us at editor@leaderonomics.com.